Guest Speech to the University of Alberta Madrigal Singers

Dear readers,

This speech was presented live on March 9, 2024 at the University of Alberta Faculty Club for the Madrigal Singers Brunch Concert and Fundraiser. 

At the request of some individuals, I have published it below, enjoy!

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Greetings U of A friends, family, and administrators,

Thank-you to Tim Shantz and the University of Alberta Madrigal Singers, otherwise referred to as MAD’s from this point onwards, for inviting me here today to speak at your brunch fundraiser. 

My name is Sable Chan and I am MAD’s alumni from 2008. I currently work as a S-LP with the public school board and run my own private practice where I have an interest in the area of voice therapy. I see patients referred from Ear, Nose, Throat specialists and work with patients diagnosed with vocal nodules, polyps, fatigue, chronic cough and more. I work with everyday speakers and singers. 

I sing with Pro Coro Canada, The Canadian Chamber Choir, and co-founded FEMME Vocal Quartet. In addition, I have been blogging about choir music for the past 15 years on TheChoirGirl.Ca. It was due to a combination of these factors that led to my recognition in Edify Magazine’s Top 40 Under 40 Class of 2019. 

As I began to reflect on my time in MAD’s, I acknowledge that my time was short, but significant, in my professional formation as a singer and health sciences professional. MAD’s was a challenge to fit into a packed Science schedule; however, there was an auspicious alignment of timetable factors in my 4th year at the University. I recall the excitement as I left my Biology lectures on the Engineering part of campus and strolled over to the Fine Arts Building for MAD’s rehearsal on a Monday afternoon. It was my first time singing in a mixed choir, as most of my early choral singing experiences were in treble voice ensembles at Schola Cantorum and Cantilon Choirs. Some highlights from that MAD’s season included singing my very first Handel’s Messiah at the Winspear and competing in the Cork International Choral Festival. 

Growing up as a chorister in Edmonton, MAD’s held this prestige in my mind as one of the most elite groups I could sing in as a young adult. I was elated when I auditioned and was accepted in my 4th year. Suddenly, I was connected to a network of passionate singers from many places and areas of study. There is an incorrect assumption that choristers at the U of A are all Music majors. In fact, singers come from all different faculties. I was delighted to know I was not the only student in Sciences and began connecting with fellow singing friends to strengthen my networks all across campus. To this date, some remain my closest friends. In fact, I just sang at a wedding of two fellow MAD’s alumni who got married to one another this past June! 

I know that when people think: University teams, they may instinctively mention areas such as sports or research. However, I think the artistic contributions of providing rich, creative opportunities, such as University music ensembles, contributes significantly to the ecosystem of the University. There is a significant population of students and staff at the U of A and it is nourishing to have opportunities to engage with a wide range of interests. We need all of these factors: athletics, research, innovation, leadership, arts and more to contribute to a diverse and healthy campus. Singing in MAD’s allowed me an opportunity to represent the U of A at local, national, and even international levels when we went to compete in Ireland at the Cork Choir Festival! 

While in MAD’s, I recall the fun and excitement of the social and performance calendar of MAD’s life: there were fundraisers to organise, Halloween parties to host, early morning radio segments to perform at, Valentine’s Day quartet gigs to sing in HUB, and it was with a mix of the most warm-hearted and loving humans. The opportunity to sing at such a high level, while completing my degree, provided me with an outlet of artistic expression, social connection, and reassuring reminders of self-confidence. 

No matter how much I might have struggled on an Immunology midterm, I knew that when I went to MAD’s rehearsal, my insecurities would lighten as I made music with others. There would be a temporary reprieve from the everyday burdens of life and burning, existential questions like: “what am I going to do with a Science degree?” Instead, we would synchronise our breath, work on musical details in Bach motets, and fall into a musical flow that seemed untouched by external time. 

There is a lightness and heaviness we all carry within us at any given moment. Singing allows us to release and share that. Instead of letting those feelings stay stuck in our body, we can mobilise and release those sentiments with a group coordination of our breath and voice. 

Choir is my means of communication and connection with others. I suspect it may be for some of you, as well. Choir, to this day, allows me to learn about new music cultures and continue to connect with new friends. I continue to write about choral music topics on my blog because I love reflecting on my own artistic choral practice. I also feel like in a world with a decreasing amount of arts media and discourse, it is important to have accessible outlets to share current perspectives on choral music. 

I love how there is always more to learn in singing. I have seen how music-making has changed in my life: it’s more and less important at any given time. However, I have always been singing. I continue to sing. And I will always be a singer. 

I hope you all will as well. 

I am grateful to be sharing this time and space with you here today. Thank-you.

Take a Listen

National Youth Choir 2012, Ottawa Podium

I never thought I would be at the age where I begin prefacing my statements with: “When I was young…” but… when I was young… there was no such thing as live-streaming. Computers were luxury items. I remember the comforting sound of the ink cartridge spitting from my DOS printer, the satisfying tear while ripping the perforated edges off my stream of printer paper, and the highly pixelated desktop from my Windows 95. 

When I entered the earlier incarnations of this very choral competition, there was a transient beauty to the process. Our choir would submit a recording entry, and if we were chosen to be a finalist, we were entered into the finals round where we could compete with another choir live on radio. Afterward, the only way to hear our performance would be to get to our stereos, put in a cassette tape, and record the time-delayed live radio broadcast. I remember actually going through my cassette tapes, rewinding them, and evaluating my emotional connection to its prior contents before taping over them. There are no such concerns with the Association of Canadian Choral Communities National Competition for Canadian Amateur Choirs because all tracks are available for live-streaming whenever you want. Thus, this current choral competition introduces a sense of permanency and the ability to share Canadian Choral music to larger audiences.

I happen to be making my guest blogger debut on CBC Music. Open up the slideshow to read my thoughts and song picks for the finalists in the three Youth Choir categories.

 

voces boreales, Ottawa Podium 2012

Live-streaming is a luxury because it grants choirs a platform to showcase the fine singing that is occurring across Canada. All choir entrants are a click of a button away for your own personal listening. Whether you agree or disagree with the comments I have made above, the most important thing is for you to take a listen and see what you think for yourself. A listener does not require a specialized degree in choral pedagogy to appreciate choral music. The beauty of music is that it has the ability to universally move us all. I encourage you all to take a listen to the fine singers in all the choral categories. They deserve to be heard.

Navigating the Virtues

Greetings readers,

In addition to general Pro Coro commitments, I have also been singing with The Ordo Collective, which is led by Eva Bostrand. In the fall, they performed Hildegard von Bingen's "Ordo virtutum" (translation: "The Way of the Virtues") and now they have reassembled the collective with some new substitutions (myself included) to perform in Calgary and Edmonton this coming weekend. Hildegard von Bingen was a nun who, in addition to her nunly duties, also happened to compose music and have the occasional divine vision. That's how choir girls used to keep busy in the 1100's.

Hildegard's "Ordo virtutum" is an early morality play which documents the temptation of the female soul (aka: Anima) by the Devil and there are 12 singers to play the "Virtues" (e.g. Chastity, Humility, Innocence etc.) to provide the lady-soul moral back-up. You may be wondering which virtues I get to play, in fact, I am "Charity" and "Modesty". I will leave that up to you, dear readers, to decide if that is fitting or not.

In terms of the rehearsal process, all I can say is that the first rehearsal was intense. Since I was one of the few choral newbies in a group with only 12 singers... I was scrambling to write pronunciation exceptions, breath marks, solo assignments, extra notes etc. as we read through the entire work. Thank goodness for friendly choral neighbours! The sound of my panicked page turns definitely rustled throughout the room. During the first run-through, it felt like every other page I had a surprise solo or I was in charge of leading the chant lines. The unison chant lines are unique in that a specific member vocally leads the group and decides where breaths are taken, how long to hold notes, supply rhythm changes etc. This role within the group is affectionately referred to as "Simon," inspired by the classic "Simon Says." Leading the group was definitely a different and challenging experience. While you don't want to leave people behind, you need to move the line forwards to keep musical momentum going. At one point during the second rehearsal, I was waiting for the line to start before I realized that everybody was looking for me to take the lead. Oops!

I find that the only way to get through slightly intense experiences like this is just to maintain a positive attitude, be open to trying anything (yes, I will sightread that solo for everybody right now!), and put in the time to figure things out at home. I am happy to report that with each rehearsal I feel exponentially more confident. This is a good thing since the next time I'll see everyone will be on performance day in Calgary. The run-through tonight was at the Providence Centre in Edmonton, a gorgeous location tucked away in a lush green pocket of Edmonton. What an appropriate setting for the music! There also are retired nuns living there who contribute to inner-city outreach programs. How cool is that?!? I think Hildegard would approve.

To learn more information about this performance, feel free to view this promotional video:

Performances:

April 21, 2012 Christ Church, Calgary @730 PM (Tickets available at the door).
April 22, 2012 Providence Centre Chapel, Edmonton @3 PM (Tickets available online and at the door).

Until next time readers, take care!

Praise the Love of Music-Making

Greetings readers!

Here is another guest blog post for The Sound and Noise:

On Monday evening, the Soweto Gospel Choir transformed the posh surroundings of the Winspear Centre into a romping showcase of tribal beats and raw vocals. For a choir that was nearing the end of their North American tour, you would have had no idea that was the case with the amount of energy radiating from each of the singers. As soon as they arrived on stage, the searing vibrancy of their costumes energized the room and complimented their full-voiced singing.

Though I cannot state the specific names of the South African songs which caught my attention, all repertoire choices revolved around the concept of "Grace". The ones that often began with an a capella solo or trio, before the addition of the rest of the chorus, were definitely highlight pieces for me. As Shimmy promised to me in the pre-concert interview, there were audience favorites such as "O Happy Day," "Bridge Over Troubled Water," "This Little Light of Mine," and "Swing Low, Sweet Chariot." There was an interesting moment, when the choir began singing Sarah McLachlan's "Angel," where I felt like I was watching a PBS Telethon. It was as if I could see the broadcast images of a horrific natural disaster with the gospel rendition of McLachlan's, "Angel," becoming an anthem for the cause. Other than that tangential image, I remained firmly entrenched in the gospel-tribal atmosphere of the entire performance.

It would be elitist of me to comment on musical aspects such as blend, intonation, and diction.... because it doesn't matter. It's not that the choir lacked any of these aspects, but I feel there is no value in discussing these areas. I am confident that if you were to speak to anybody in the audience, they would all agree that the Soweto Gospel Choir knows how to put on a show. Every part of their show entertained the audience from the kinetic kung-fu-like dance moves, the belting solos, and the sense of flirtatious fun between the singers. Though set choreography guided the overall visual presentation of each song; the individualism of each singer appeared within each of the movements. A slight delay in a clap, a subtle head nod in response to a soloist, a quick moment of eye contact with one the musicians on stage accompany them--- these small moments created a performance that had an air of organic ease. When music and choreography is so closely intertwined, as it in the case with the Soweto Gospel Choir, how can you possibly stay still? It really reflects the vision of the ensemble and what they wish to present to their audience. The power of the Soweto Gospel Choir comes from the fact that they are able to demonstrate for an audience, in its raw form, the love of music-making. It was apparent that the choir's love of music was infectious, since I have never seen such a diverse array of step and claps during a Winspear Centre encore.

Until next time readers, take care!

The Choral Fabric of the Stuttgart Chamber Choir

Greetings readers!

Posted below is a concert review I covered for Sound and Noise:

The Stuttgart Chamber Choir was so good that, frankly, it makes me sick. How can a choir be that good? Recognition must be given to the Richard Eaton Singers for bringing in the Stuttgart Chamber Choir; a stellar addition in celebration of their 60^th anniversary season. Conducted by Frieder Bernius, the Stuttgart Chamber Choir was joined by TorQ Percussion Quartet from Toronto this past Wednesday evening.

The program began and ended with what I would expect a German choir to sing best, repertoire by German composers. In this case, it was Bach and Mendelssohn. As far as I’m concerned, the choir provided the model choral sound for these composers. Listening to Bach’s “Singet dem Herrn” was like hearing the aural construction of a luxury fabric. Only the finest vocal threads were chosen and interwoven into a sound textile that was uniform, seamless, and impenetrable. I would expect no less of German workmanship. The musical lines within the Bach were sung with such motile precision. If I wanted to acoustically parse each of the notes in the running lines, they would all have been equally balanced and resonant. As well, their German diction was so clean; I could have easily transcribed every phoneme that they were singing, further demonstrating how they have the prototype choral sound for Bach. The collective choral voice was clean, crisp and pliable. Mendelssohn’s “Te Deum” was sung with the same precision and the text stanza’s were interspersed with lyrical lines sung by a quartet of singers. They had an amazing bass singer in the quartet, who just so happened to be featured in every soloistic combination during the concert. I developed a choir girl crush on him. The “Te Deum” also featured the solo work of a full-bodied mezzo-soprano; a refreshing change from the crisp choral texture. My highlight moment within the “Te Deum” was the pleading echos of “Miserere nostri/have mercy on us” from individual voices within the choir. The overlapping and weaving laments produced collective sentiments that were hauntingly helpless.

 

The Stuttart Chamber Choir rearranged themselves in order to perform Ligeti’s “Lux Aeterna,” decreasing their choir size of 27 to 16 in order to have an individual voice on each part. I have sung Ligeti’s “Lux Aeterna” before. It is not easy. It made me want to clutch helplessly onto my tuning fork, but I knew, deep down, that it wasn't going to help me. The strings of sound dissonance were sung with an unwavering confidence. The chromatic tones emerged from the individual parts to compose an impermeable core sound. The chords would miraculously lock after all of the individual chromatic movements and eventual decrescendo to a low F drone in the alto voices. Their performance made Ligeti’s piece sound easy. At points, I was quietly laughing to myself, in disbelief, in response to how they were able to carry off that piece.

The words within Pärt’s “Nunc dimittis” are taken from the book of Luke and details Simeon words to the baby Jesus in Jerusalem. Simeon does not wish to die until he has seen, with his own eyes, his Saviour. As an audience member, I expected an epiphanal moment within the piece. However, during “Nunc dimittis,” I felt Stuttgart’s performance had a restrained energy. Though the performance of any piece is up to artistic interpretation, I just felt like the choir could have stretched their emotional limits in this one. Personally, I prefer choirs that take a risk. I like choirs that sound almost overwhelmed, brimming with passionate intensity in response to the text and music. At the climax of “Nunc dimittis,” when the choir sings of the revelatory light and calls out to the people of Israel, I just felt like they could have given more. I wanted more. Sure, that might mean that they could potentially sound sloppy from all that unbridled emotion (I don’t think that’s possible) but I just wanted to hear an eruption of sound. Instead, their sound just felt contained.

The showcase work, by Montreal composer, Paul Frehner, “Corpus,” incorporated the talents of the TorQ Percussion Quartet. According to Frehner’s program notes, he wished to create a piece that explored the “mystical, religious and metaphysical writings on the universal topics of the human body…. in its various states of life, death, oblivion, and afterlife.” That’s all very nice and well, but how does that translate to a performance? Overall, this work sounded like an epic play to me. The vocal components played individual characters, working together to tell the story in solo and chorus combinations, and the percussion created the sound environment. Frehner’s piece has such a dense network of concepts and lends itself well to continuous musical analysis. The piece began with a monotone solo with an eerie suspension in the soprano section paired with the ominous bass voices. There were also two superimposed chant lines within the piece. The power of the TorQ Percussion Quartet did have the tendency to overwhelm Stuttgart’s sound and it was apparent that TorQ had to restrain themselves in order to achieve balance. Which is a shame because they were brilliant. This was especially apparent when the canon of drums percolated throughout the church and cascaded into a vibrant cacophony. They also had such a diverse array of percussion instruments and techniques to create sounds from the resonant metallic echos to the tensile tones created when bowing a cymbal. TorQ created sound textures that evoked strong images and emotional reactions from the audience. I especially enjoyed the end of the piece where the atonal modern chant line in the choir was paired with the tribal groove of the percussion. The resulting effect was quite remarkable.

Being able to witness choral performances, such as this concert with the Stuttgart Chamber Choir, reminded me of the expansive range of choral talent in the world. It's easy to forget when you're tucked away in a wintery Canadian city. Though I am an avid chorister, it is rare for me to hear a professional ensemble. It is difficult to have opportunities to hear what the best sounds like, but when it is in your neighborhood, you would be doing yourself a disservice not to take a listen.

Until next time readers, take care!

A New Year

As the start of my first rehearsal approaches, I am filled with thoughts about the upcoming choral season and what I have in store for myself. Although it is not the start of the new year, it feels like a fresh year as I brace myself for a new school and choir season.

I start to think about anything and everything related to music and one thing I have been contemplating is conductor styles within a choir. Throughout the years, I have had the experience to work with a variety of conductors, everyone with their own particular style and expectations, but it made me wonder... what am I looking for in a conductor? My first conductor in Junior Choir had a nurturing and motherly nature, which was excellent for easing myself into this new musical artform; however, my demands in a conductor began to change as my skill level progressed.

Following that conductor, my Intermediate choir conductor was extremely artistic and expressive. She would always walk about the room freely vocalizing and encouraging you to do so as well in order to explore the flexibility of your own vocal cords and sound. This exploratory stage allowed me to start figuring out what works and what doesn't, oh yes, and make a fool out of myself vocally :)

After intermediate choir, I entered Chamber Choir and this, by far, was my first intense choral group. Suddenly, I was placed with singers who had undergone a slightly more selective screening process and I was filled with a sense of prestige. However, this is soon cut down as I began to realize that my conductor had high demands for herself as well as her choir. I do not want to make her into some dictatorial entity but, at times, that was what she was like to me... and I absolutely thrived upon it! I wanted somebody telling me when things did not sound correct and her furrowed brow and slightly killer glare would scare even the most passive chorister. This, in turn, caused me to become extremely impatient and intolerant of choristers who did not have the same high standards I had for myself and the choir. These choristers are everywhere, perhaps singers who were forced into choir by their parents or choristers who are only singing for easy credit. I have no patience for these types of singers. They bring down the energy of the choral group! There is so much potential in every single singer that it is frustrating to hear them not utilizing their talents. One of the things that makes any ensemble succeed is the determination and commitment of every single member. This is even more of challenge within a choir since you are often working with a large group of people. Coordinating 5 members to commit is one thing but making 35 singers commit is another challenge entirely. A demanding conductor ensures that every chorister is giving their very best. If singers are not committed to the choir, it does not make sense that the other choristers in the group should suffer as well. I think my pleasure in having somebody demand so much from me is also due in part to my upbringing. My childhood was filled with critique rather than praise. I always knew that if my parents were quiet, I was doing something correctly; however, if I ever stepped out of line, I would experience, how I like to put it, the "Asian smack-down," whether that be verbal or physical :) Don't get me wrong, I'm in no way bitter about my upbringing, it is actually quite funny to me now as I understand the love behind all the actions, but this transferred to choir since I was happy with critique.

My conductor's high demands allowed us to win numerous awards and that reinforcement only increased my competitive nature. Of course, as I grew older, priorities in my life changed as well and life changes also caused my choir conductor slacken her iron fist as well. The thing I enjoy most about Belle Canto right now is that all the women in it are extremely dedicated to singing but they also have other lives as well. We try as much as we can to coordinate all our schedules and, while it is frustrating at times, there are climatic musical moments that I have felt while singing with them. When I was younger, I had so much more time to dedicate to my obsessive need for choral perfection; however, this has changed. As much as I love choir... it is not my career. It is my hobby. I find I enjoy it more this way because I do not rely on choral singing to support me financially. I also find that once money is added into an equation, my feelings towards something change. While I still secretly thrive for the need for a conductor to be demanding and somewhat dictatorial, I am glad that my conductor is able to cater her style to suit the style of each particular group. I think that's what's most important: adaptation. Every group has different needs; thus, different approaches must be used. For younger groups, a more exploratory strategy for musical learning is suitable, and as you have a more concentrated group of skilled singers, it is appropriate to have higher musical demands.

I encourage you to evaluate what musical teaching style you respond most to. I would love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below!

Blog of Note

Greetings to those of you visiting my blog for the first time! I was informed that I am a "Blog of Note" today and I thank you for coming to my blog and seeing what I have to say.

I love everything related to choral music because there is a genesis of intense musical energy when a group of singers are all focused on the same goal. It is truly amazing when you are able to feel the physical energy of the singer next to you, as you feel the silent expansion of their lungs, and the blending of multiple voices to form a unified acoustic waveform radiating towards the audience. I try to blog about choir related topics ranging from choir uniforms to unique touring experiences; however, I love all things related to music, whether it is discovering new artists or composing my own pieces, all these areas inspire my posts as well.

Thank you again for visiting and happy reading! I hope to hear your thoughts in the comment sections!

Memorable Singing Moment

Let me recount one of my most memorable singing moments: The CBC Choral Competition 2004.

Every other year the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation hosts a choral competition for choirs from all arenas from Children to Church. All the choirs send in a set of one-take recordings of A Capella pieces to the CBC competition. The recordings go through multiple levels but, ultimately, what results is the final round of the competition where the final choirs compete on live, national radio and are immediately adjudicated and the winners are announced live. The first year I was in Chamber Choir the CBC 2000 competition was the only thing we did not win first place in. The Kiwanis local, provincial, and national competition we won first place but we only received 2nd place in CBC. We were content with this fact since it was our first year and we were proud of what we were able to achieve. However, the second time the competition came in 2002, we performed well enough to win first, but we received second. O.k, sure, so I could have looked at this positively and have seen the situation as "We won second place!" but who am I kidding? We wanted first place and we deserved it, I am not going to play psychological tricks to make myself feel better.

There are a lot of variables that come into the equation during a live radio performance. Our rival choir was singing within the CBC studios in Toronto and we were in a downtown Edmonton church. As much as they try to make things fair, there are going to be differences and unfortunately, we felt that the recording that they got of us did not accurate reflect our sound. The sound techs physically separated the two microphones and placed them on each end section of the choir. Thus, you can imagine that the only sounds that were heard were from either end of the choir and it really picked up the individual voices from those ends as well. However, CBC 2004 was our year. Since Chamber Choir consists of singers with a wide variety of ages, we were able to enter the Children's Choir category and the Youth Choir category. We just had to have older choristers sit out for the Children's Choir category and have the young ones sit out for the Youth Choir category.

I don't recall exactly what we sang at this point. I have done so many of these competitions that repertoire lists all running together in my mind. What I do remember is singing Kaipaava and feeling the musical energy of the choristers surrounding me. There's a point when everybody in a choir is so focused on the performance that they are investing every particle of their being to produce a truly musical performance. The point where these intensity frequencies align is when there is a burst of musical epiphany. It is the point when you are so in tune with other choristers that you can feel the person at the end of the choir breathe and when you take a breath you feel that you are apart of a massive entity. The performance fear and competition stress melts away and something absolutely magical happens: you transcend the physical performance and you experience the music-making from a non-physical plane. It is as if everybody is just working together to weave together a musical fabric using gold threads and when the tapestry is finished and is exposed to light, there is a overwhelming gold gleam that radiates from the fabric. This explosion of light is equal to the musical climax achieved through our performance. It is something that is so hard to describe, it truly must be experienced to understand, but this was one of the first times I had the chance to experience it within a choral performance. It is such a musically energetic high and it is so addictive. I find that I am still singing because I am trying to seek out that next instance where I can feel that explosion of musical energy. As you can probably tell by now...I'm addicted to choir. Any performance after that experience is just a desperate attempt to recreate the energy felt during that first performance. I am grateful to say I have experienced it since (for future posts) but it is something that is so hard to come by and choristers search the rest of their lives to feel what they felt during that defining moment. It is a matter of everything being perfectly aligned in that one moment. It occurred with a particular set of singers, in a specific context, under specific conditions. It can never be perfectly replicated but, as choristers, as search for that next musical drug fix.

In closing, I have posted a clip of that very performance of Kaipaava since it was captured on radio by CBC. Posted below is that performance immortalized within this digital sample. Sure, when I listen to the performance now, I can hear that it was in no way a perfect performance, however, the musical connection I felt with every single chorister was perfect and I would not trade it for anything.

Camp: A Rite of Passage

Choir camp can be viewed in two ways:

1. A fun opportunity to hang out with all your awesome choir friends with minimal supervision where you can sing 4-5 rehearsals a day, eat (contraband) junkfood, enjoy the outdoors, or as I often did in later years, work with other studious choristers to complete homework at communal group lounges located at the backs of cabins.

or

2. A frightening prospect where you are cast into the seclusion of the woods, away from your own bed for the first time in your life, and are forced to make friends or spend the choral season alone and friendless.

You can probably imagine which scenario I viewed my first choir camp as. Yes, if you guessed number two, that is absolutely correct. It would be a few years at least before I developed a comfortable routine at camp. I remember remember asking my conductor, Jan, if camp was mandatory. When I found out that there was no way out of it, I tried to mentally prepare myself for the trip into the musical wilderness. I did not anticipate, however, the surfacing of my mother's nerves. I remember her convincing me to stay home the night before I was supposed to leave. That would be choir social suicide? I knew the consequences of not going and as afraid as I was to spend a weekend with choristers who were strangers to me, the thought of still not knowing everybody when they all returned to choir after the weekend was even more daunting. I was frantically trying to assemble the things I would need, and since I had never traveled before, I did not have travel friendly sizes of any necessary toiletries. Hardly a worry, I know, but it is amusing how devastating the effects of non-conformity can have upon a child. Small details such as using dollar store markers to color next to a child who owns the spectrum of vibrant Mr. Sketch markers with their addictive scents, coloring with more brilliancy than dollar store markers could ever hope to achieve. Oh, the shame! However, going back to the matter of lacking necessary toiletries, my mother disguised her worry by lending me an array of lovely travel-sized toiletries. My Dad showed his worry by stuffing my backpack full of cookies and juice boxes since his greatest fear would be me starving out in the wild.

I remember entering the bustling cabin out at camp He-Ho-Ha. The continuous metallic snapping of the doors as children were running in and out, the hollow rumbling produced by sock-wearing feet echoed through the wall from the adjoining cabin, and the crackle of the plastic lined mattresses as choristers tested out their temporary beds. There were children running everywhere and though I managed to secure a place to sleep for myself in a room full of choristers, I ultimately felt alone. What I did not know at that moment is that I would emerge from choir camp as a new person. As I opened my backpack and watched the plethora of snacks spill out onto my sleeping bag, it occurred to me that I had food to share. For anybody who needs to make friends, in choir or anywhere else, just offer them free food! Later, I opened my toiletry bag to see what my Mom packed and a young chorister passing by stopped in her tracked and gawked at the array of Aveda products I was lent to use.

"Those are designer!" she exclaimed in surprise, and being surprised at the fact that she was paying attention to me, I gave her a shy smile, but was silently pleased at the things I was given to use.

I went to the first choir rehearsal in the large rehearsal hall at the camp and my glowing conductor got things underway. I am not sure if it was during this time, or during another rehearsal that weekend, but she got the idea to have a little contest. She picked up the small, gleaming, pumpkin-orb sitting on the grand piano and showed it to all of us. There would be a contest to see whoever is sitting with the best posture throughout camp, determined by our pianist, Bob, and whoever he named as the chorister with the best posture would win the now highly coveted pumpkin trophy in her hands. It surprises me to this day how so much symbolic power can be bestowed upon something so small. When Jan announced the contest, I remember scoffing at the fact I had no chance at winning the cute little pumpkin. Sure, prior to camp I tried to sit with good posture, I was not taught any other way! It was my first time in choir, so whatever Jan told me to do...I did. Sit at the edge of my chair? done. Form a better "oh" vowel with my lips? sure. Breathe from my tummy and not my chest? o.k. Needless to say, I didn't think about winning the trophy at any point during the rest of the weekend.

Due to the fact that choir camp is not completely comprised of singing, meals and nature walks were proposed to give choristers a more balanced weekend. Thus, during our mandatory social times where we were forced to participate in outdoor activities; I unwillingly signed up for soccer in the small Quad area. I hate soccer. Please let me revise, I hate playing soccer. It is due largely in part to the fact that my asthmatic lungs always found it problematic to provide enough oxygen to run along the large stretch of field and I found it pointless that we would all be forced to run back and forth for no reason in order to chase a ball which would be quickly be redirected elsewhere. I dislike the unnecessary exertion of my energy. However, as the game began, I tried my best to be a team player and contribute what I could to the group effort. I found it surprisingly motivating to have the soccer parents, who came along as camp chaperones, cheering at the sidelines. At one point, I managed to get myself a ball and zipped down the short field to score my first goal. The instantaneous love heaped upon me immediately following that goal was staggering and slightly addictive. I did not score another goal but after the game my team members and I happily walked towards the lunch hall while recalling memorable moments during the game. I suppose soccer has some merits after all :)

The final rehearsal meant that the pumpkin award ceremony was nearing. The rehearsal went smoothly enough but there was insurmountable tension in the room as Jan asked Bob to walk to the centre and announce the winner. I sat back in seat pondering who had the best posture in the choir and when he had the time to watch everybody's posture while playing the piano during rehearsals. He began his posture adjudication by listing the names of many popular choristers (who I thought had the best chance of winning) who had very good posture most of the times that he watched them and there was a feeling of satisfaction in the air in response to the news. However, when Bob finally said:

"Sable"

I sat there in silence. Sure, my posture was alright, but was it good enough to trump the posture of choristers who had years of experience on me? I didn't think so. I was truly shocked. I remember there was cheering and applause and I remember being beckoned from my seat to the front of the choir to receive my mini pumpkin award. I remember walking up to Jan, still stunned into silence at the news, to receive my pumpkin award while trying to smile for the photo being taken of me with her. I walked back to my seat as the choristers buzzed around me to get a closer look at my glossy pumpkin prize. Back at the cabin as parents were showing up to pick up their children, everybody wanted to hold my prize and see what the little pumpkin looked like up close. I was happy to share and show everybody my new trophy and I was beaming at the fact that everybody was so happy for me and I enjoyed the fact these initial strangers were feeling like my friends at the end of the weekend. I'm sure my Dad was relieved to see that his shy daughter was getting so much positive attention from all the young girls as people were calling out my name and scurrying after me to look at my prize. Personally, the pumpkin did not leave me tripping over myself, as it did others. I thought the pumpkin was cute and it was surreal to go home with the prize. When I went home and put the pumpkin on a shelf, and promptly forgot about it since it lost some of its power away from the choral infused surroundings, I was surprised to see it was eaten through with mold a few weeks later. I happily tossed it out, but the symbolic potency that little pumpkin has remains ingrained in me to this day. Receiving that award was a catalyst for my choral career and gave me the confidence and reassurance that I knew what I was doing and that I was good at it as well. Even if I didn't win the award, I'm sure I would still be singing today, however, it just felt really nice to be rewarded and recognized for choral eagerness so early on in my choral experience.

Thus, I left camp with good friends, lasting memories, and a little pumpkin award. My pumpkin talisman was the first gems I acquired during a definitive choral rite of passage.

Until next post, take care readers!

An Introduction

Just to give a short introduction of myself, I have been singing in choirs for the last 11 years and since I am only 22...that is half my life. I began my choral journey with my junior choir audition. I dreaded the thought of singing for a stranger but I understood that auditions were a necessary evil of the musical world. My family reassured me by telling me that the audition was simply there so that they could place my voice type within the choral surroundings. I sang "There is a Castle on a Cloud" from Les Miserables. Prior to this, it was ingrained into me that karaoke and Andrew Lloyd Webber were at the core of musical experience; thus, the reason for my musical theatre choice. It was either that or an extremely outdated Cantonese pop ballad. I remember the intense nerves I had going into that intimidating college room but the warm presence of the lovely conductor calmed my nerves and I sang to the imaginary audience she gestured to in the far corner of the room. Upon completion of the audition, she used vocabulary slightly advanced for me to grasp at that time, but it led to me believe that she would be honoured to have me in the choir. I remember my mother asking me:

"Did you get in?" and I replied,

"I think so..."

She looked at me impatiently, clearly unsatisfied with the ambiguity of my answer, but it seemed as if things were falling to place as I received my registration materials in the mail.

Extreme shyness gripped me as I entered the first junior choir rehearsal since I realized that I knew no one in the room. I was the lone Asian girl in a sea of sociable choristers who were reuniting from the previous choral year. Of course, I was not the only new chorister, but my egocentric mind was not able to acknowledge the other choristers who were feeling the same way I was. However, I received a great sense satisfaction and personal belonging when I spotted my black music binder on a seat in the third row of the alto section. Just knowing that this particular seat was reserved specifically for me eased my nerves considerably. It is similar to emerging from a flight and descending upon the arrivals area in an unknown city. You might be slightly anxious since you are hoping that the person who has promised to pick you up is there. At the moment you see them, a wave of comfort flows through you since you realize that they are there to receive you and no one else. The plain, green chair in the rehearsal room was my welcoming person and I was happy to take my rightful spot in the choir. One of the first activities we did in choir was to form a large circle and introduce ourselves. The conductor revealed a prop to help initiate the icebreaker: a microphone. Seeing the plastic microphone made my heart flutter as it was truly a sign from the karaoke Gods that I was on the right path. The microphone was passed from chorister to chorister and we were instructed to introduce ourselves by singing into it:

"I am _____".

However, upon demonstration by the conductor who sang each syllable of the phrase with an alternating major third interval, every chorister copied her musical line and sang their names the exact same way. Of course, lacking nerve and creativity, I was no exception to this pattern. Thankfully, that introduction did not leave me scarred and I tried to maintain a low profile for the rest of the rehearsal.

I do not recall whether it was that first day in rehearsal, but a gentle looking girl with gorgeous curly hair combatted the returning chorister tendency to alienate newcomers and introduced herself to me as Jenny. I remember trying to be reciprocate her friendliness in my timid way and she also introduced the Indian girl, Nadia, next to her who gave me a smile. I am proud to say that to this day Nadia remains one of my closest friends and she is not alone in this position since I have forged many lasting friendships with fellow choristers. However, I will leave those stories for another day.

The Beginning

Greetings!

I have been blogging for a few years now but I have mainly documented my life and have never branched into the public blog arena. However, I am attempting to change that with the introduction of this new choir blog. I will write about all things music related: songs, conductors, composers, music festivals, choristers, uniforms, touring, recording, and anything else that comes to my mind. I would also like to start profiling choristers from around the world. Overall, I just wish to write about one of my passions and I hope that some of my thoughts and stories will amuse you.

One of the most critical components of being a chorister is sharing an individual voice so that individual musical frequencies fuse with the acoustic sound being generated by surrounding individuals in order to produce a seamless, complex waveform that electrically excites air molecules and transfers to listeners. Being in a choir is not about being a soloist but working together with other musicians to become a unified vocal instrument. I know choral singing is perhaps not the most trendy musical arena since images of stuffy mass adult choirs singing ominous choruses and the sound of creaky senior church choirs arise when asked to picture a stereotypical choir; however, I know that for those who have had a taste of choral singing, there is something about being within a community of singers that seems to foster an atmosphere for musical excellence and allows choristers to connect with one another in a visceral and musically gratifying manner.

In conclusion, a quote from Sir. Paul McCartney:

"I love to hear a choir. I love the humanity to see the faces of real people devoting themselves to a piece of music. I like the teamwork. It makes me feel optimistic about the human race when I see them cooperating like that"

Take care readers!