Opera Girl?

Greetings readers,

It's official: I am back in Pro Coro Canada for another season. What a huge relief! I saw the e-mail yesterday afternoon in my inbox and my stomach just twisted in upon itself. My heart raced as I opened up the PDF document... thank goodness, I saw my name printed. Although some friends did not seem to be surprised at my good news, I prefer to live with the perpetual fear of rejection. It's just how I roll.

While I still have more Podium interview posts to compose and publish, I thought I would fill you all in on my last audition project: the Edmonton Opera Chorus. This is new territory for me dear readers. I have never considered myself an "opera" singer. I watch opera. I enjoy opera. I don't sing opera. Alas, it's always good to come out of my comfort zone as an artist. I approached the audition as a musical experiment rather than a make-or-break career opportunity.

First, I needed to decide what I was going to sing. I am a choir girl through and through. Therefore, I do not have suitcase arias I can just bust out. I looked through some repertoire for standard mezzo opera arias; the thought of performing some of them seemed daunting. After consulting with some music friends, they suggested some Handel operas. That seemed like a happy compromise due to my familiarity with performing choral works by Handel. Thus, "Ombra mai fu" and "Sevgliatevi nel core" were my final choices. Personally, I felt like I was breaching my comfort zone with the latter choice because it's a pretty vengeful, power-packed pants role; however, what's life without a little bit of risk?

On the day of the audition I arrived 20 minutes early for my audition. I learned my lesson from my Pro Coro audition experience: do not start projects you cannot finish before you need to be somewhere. Actually, a good piece of advice for most things in life.

I strolled into the backstage of the Jubilee Auditorium and followed the directions from the security guard to the rehearsal hall. I was greeted by the receptionist and directed to a music stand in a corridor to wait. While I sat calmly in the waiting room filling out my personal information, I glanced over at the poised girl in black sitting near me. She looked down at her hands, gently placed on her music book, mentally preparing for her upcoming performance, a supportive male companion by her side. I looked around myself. My bag was splayed next to my chair, bursting with a change of clothing and casual shoes for my visit to the farmer's market afterwards. While I was tempted to check my Twitter feed, I reasoned that this would probably be a good time to mentally prepare for my audition as well. I glanced through the Italian I was supposed to communicate. Nothing novel occurred to me that I didn't already consider. The check-in receptionist beckoned me back over to her table.

"I just need to take some photos of you," she stated with a smile. I agreed and waited for her to direct me to an appropriate wall area. "Just down here," she said while walking down to the middle landing on the stairs. On the wall behind her stood a height scale.

She instructed me to stand in front of it. "You may need to take off your shoes," while taking a closer look at my short heels, "actually, they're fine." I proceeded to take them off anyway. As a scientist, I'm all for obtaining accurate measurements. She took a full-on face picture. "Cool!" I thought to myself getting ready to head back to my spot. "Side profile now please," she instructed. I turned to the side and attempted to look poised, parallel to the height lines. "Now a full-body shot," she stated before taking a step back to increase her frame size. If somebody unearthed a weight scale at this point, I would not have been surprised. This was very different from a choir audition! Once my choral mugshot was finished, I returned to the waiting room and listened to my fellow auditionee who was now belting out some serious opera arias. "Holy crap she has quite the a voice in her!" I thought to myself. Strangely enough, it didn't make me nervous or jealous - I was just enjoying the music I was hearing. As soon as she stepped out of the room, I felt the clutch of nervousness in my abdomen. It was my turn.

I went up a few stairs to the rehearsal hall, my heels echoing on the hardwood floor. Looking to the left, I noticed the piano bench was empty. On my right were two smiling figures walking towards me with outstretched hands ready for a welcome handshake. The woman saw my bicycle helmet clanging next to my bag, "You're ready for the audition! You even brought your helmet!" I smiled and alerted her it was for transport purposes only. The opera chorus master, Michael, greeted me second. Yet another Michael deciding my choral fate. Michael asked me what I was singing. "Handel and more Handel," I answered. "What else do you sing?" he asked.

I was silent, unsure of how to answer. Uh-oh... I didn't have any other opera arias from other composers prepared. Sensing my apprehension, he proceeded to clarify, "What other kinds of repertoire do you sing?" I informed them that I normally sing in choral ensembles, so choir music, folk music, early music... I'm sure he noticed I didn't say opera. Michael walked over to the piano to accompany me. I began with "Ombra mai fu." I did feel a bit restrained, trying not to let my nervousness be audible, but I navigated my way through the piece without any major detours. Once I finished, Michael asked how much volume I was using. I thought about it for a moment and came to the subjective conclusion that I was using 75% of my volume. "What does 100% sound like?" he asked me with a curious look in his eyes. " I'm not sure," I replied, "I don't normally sing with 100% of my volume," I said honestly.

Michael proceeded to tell me that singers are faced with the challenge that it is hard to hear ourselves. I agreed completely. He told me that it's easy to hold back in an ensemble. I agreed again. I do feel that after years of ensemble singing I have developed a heightened ensemble sensitivity. A lot of what I do vocally is in response to what I see from a conductor and what I sense from the other singers around me. Thus, in an audition setting where I am singing solo, I don't really know how much sound output I should yield.

"Do the first phrase again, but this time I want 100%," he requested. I sang it again. I felt like I was shoving some pretty serious subglottal pressure through my vocal folds. A ton of vibrato-filled sound emerged from me. Not particularly subtle but it was a lot of sound. Both Michael and the other woman looked at me with excited eyes. "You should always be singing with that sound!" he continued, "even in my chorus I want my singers to be singing." I understood. I continued on with the next song. Since it was more power-packed, it was easier to maintain my operatic core. Upon arrival at the more contemplative B section, I proceeded to pull back a bit. Michael stopped me mid phrase. He reminded me of the sound he wanted. I sang it again with the same operatic intensity. At this point, it was beginning to feel like a voice masterclass; it was fun to stop-and-start sections in the piece and experiment with an operatic voice. They were both so encouraging; I couldn't have imagined a more supportive and singer-friendly environment. He stopped me after a few more phrases and asked me if we could end there. I told him that if he felt like he had what he needed, I was fine to leave things where they were. I left the audition thinking: That was fun!

Although I don't know where things go from here, I was glad to emerge from my opera audition intact and thankful to receive some feedback. Due to my choral commitments for Pro Coro, I already know I have conflicts with 2/3 operas this season. However, who knows what will happen for that 1/3. I am content to just enjoy the present.

Until next time readers, take care!

Audition Day P. III

Greetings readers,

I know that some of you may be wondering: "How did you do?"

And with my deflective answer, I will just say: "You'll have to ask Zaugg."

I'm guessing that's not enough to satiate your curiosity.

I'm glad to report that, although nothing is for certain, I did the very best that I could do. I felt the process allowed me to demonstrate the range of my skills, whether it was my glaring weaknesses or my apparent strengths. I felt exponentially better each day so by the time I reached the third ensemble... I wasn't worrying about my position within the choir but focusing on the fact that I was getting to make music with different groups of talented people. As well, upon further reflection, I realized that some of our auditions actually began back in November. This was when Zaugg started working with Pro Coro for the first time in preparation for his Artistic Director audition concert. Working with singers within a natural context can't beat an audition process, where tasks and pieces are selected in order to simulate the same environment. 

Overall, I felt like it was a fair process and that everybody had their own opportunities to demonstrate their musical prowess. Zaugg was very clear at the start of the ensemble portion that he would be giving direct, specific feedback to singers in order to avoid a "Oh, but if you only told me to do _____" type of situation when he provides feedback later this Spring (all singers, successful or unsuccessful, will be receiving written feedback regarding their performance). Well, he definitely told us what he wanted individually from each singer so we really have no one to blame but ourselves if we didn't respond to his feedback.

What was also remarkable was how different each of the ensembles felt. While there may have been some similar analogies and questions, I was often surprised by new twists. One such moment was singing through the Lidholm piece past the marked boundaries of the quick-study passage. That was totally unexpected. Another was running Mozart's "Kyrie" in mini quartets facing each other in a circle; it was super fun passing the thematic lines to one another as we made our way through the piece. I also noticed it was so much easier singing the moving sixteenth notes when I could hear the Kyrie theme sung straight at me. If only more things were blatantly obvious in choir. Also, it was refreshing to make eye contact with other singers who had parallel passages and initiate musical sequences together. There was a really nice sense of choral camaraderie within the ensembles. These mini quartets, I think, were one my favorite parts from the ensemble audition. As well, there were moments when things just clicked. One of my alto partners and I managed to execute a Mozart run with equivalent momentum and articulation at the start of the "Kyrie". I knew it was noteworthy because even Zaugg looked up from his stand to acknowledge it.

Now what? Well, there are still two more days of auditions in May for those singers who could not make the first audition round and then the final singer roster will be announced mid-May. Zaugg remarked that he would release results on May 13, however, after a brief moment of reflection, he realized that, perhaps, he shouldn't do it on Mother's Day. I agree. All I know is that I will either be a very happy or very sad Choir Girl while in Toronto (that's where I'll be before Podium 2012). May the best chorister sing!

Until next time readers, take care!

Audition Day P.II

Greetings readers,

Day three of auditions has now finished and yesterday was the first day of ensemble auditions. I can say, with confidence, that this is by far the most comprehensive, consuming, and yet, exciting audition process I have ever been through. With the verbal and written comments I've been receiving from my Audition Part I entry and reading the news feed updates of local singers... it is safe to say the entire choral community is buzzing. There is such a sense of shared community uniting us as we navigate our way through the path that Zaugg has constructed for us.

The ensemble portion of the audition consisted of working through Mozart's "Kyrie," Debussy's "Dieu! qu'il la fair bon regarder!" Webern's "Entflieht auf leichten Kähnen..." and a second shot at the Lidholm quick-study from the individual audition. It was like a choral masterclass since there were only about 10-12 singers, which equated to around 2-3 people on each part. In an intimate, yet supportive setting, Zaugg challenged us to take a critical look at the music, chord progressions and how these corresponded to crucial moments or the structural progression in a musical passage. He illustrated how to articulate the "Kyrie" text in order to mimic the bow contact of a string instrument within the musical lines. As well, he emphasized the need for a seamless sense of ensemble in the Debussy, and instructed us to eliminate our visual and auditory senses (eyes closed; no audible breath) to innately feel the fluid momentum of the work as a conjoined entity. We also experimented the auditory effects of having unmatched vowels on chords, with the basses producing a slightly more spread vowel on purpose. The pulsating acoustic instability of the chord was instantly perceptible. This was juxtaposed with a balanced chord column of sound. I would love to analyze and compare those spectrograms. It has definitely been a long time since I've dedicated that much concentration to thinking about the text, musical structures, and chord tuning in a focused set of works. It's quite luxurious to bask in the self-indulgent nature of music-making and the satisfaction that comes from producing detail-oriented work. That is what makes the ensemble audition so exciting: the energy and interaction with the other singers. Auditioning can be a lonely process so it's really fortunate that we have the ability to demonstrate our chorister ensemble skills as well.

While reflecting upon the audition process so far, I think there is a sense of apprehension but eagerness towards the prospect of the unknown. Everybody is shaken, nobody feels safe, and as frightening as it is for me to be a part of that pool of participants... it's exactly what Pro Coro needs and why Zaugg is the new Artistic Director. I find I'm struggling between a sense of curiosity as an objective spectator but, at the same time, a looming anxiety regarding the outcomes of the process. It's taking a fair amount of mental stamina to make it through this process. Meanwhile, there is another day of ensemble auditions today and nothing is for sure yet. It can be crippling to focus on the uncertainty of the future; however, the future depends on present and that is where I intend to focus my energy for today. It's not over until it's over, right?

Until next time readers, take care! 

Audition Day P.I

Greetings readers,

Yes, I know, you're probably all curious and wondering how the Pro Coro individual auditions went for me. Lucky for you, dear readers, it appears that my sense of shame does not hinder me from sharing my experience with you.

Firstly, you know it's not a great sign when you arrive at an audition and the response to your arrival is: "You've allowed no time to look through the quick-study." 

"Great..." I thought to myself while trying to stifle a flashback to the powerpoint presentation that remained half-finished on my laptop, a string of last-minute supervisor edits in my inbox, and an evening submission deadline looming. "Focus," I said silently to myself, as I cued myself back to the present.

As I stood there in the hallway, I glanced down at my watch. "I still have 5"ish" minutes," I thought to myself. I took out my tuning fork, struck it, and held it to my ear, why couldn't I find my note? I paused and noticed the dominant piano accompaniment echoing from the room next door. Oh yes, there's a festival class going on right now. Why do I suddenly hear the music on the page? Oh, somebody who was on-time was working through it on the piano in the practice room. While standing at the music stand in the hallway, I attempted to work through some of the initial intervals in the piece. Suddenly, I noticed the same feeling of cascading frenzy I get when I attempt to cram before an exam.

This was not helping. I should just go in. I knew very well that the audition was constructed in a way that would make my choral deficits extremely apparent. Therefore, I should just embrace it.

Here is a figure to illustrate my sight-reading skills:

You can tell I'm a Science student, right?

Confounding variables aside (a.k.a excuses), I am not surprised by my performance because it was representative of my skill level in that particular construct. If I had to estimate my sight-reading mean, meaning a piece that would give an average view of my abilities, it would be something formulaic by Handel. Thus, if I were to sight-read something like that, I would be able to make my way through it relatively unscathed. My performance dispersion on either side of the mean highlights a ± 1 standard deviation, encapsulating 68% of my sight-reading abilities. The upper 34% would be like sight-reading pieces I have sung in the distant past, thus, increasing my perceived performance proficiency due to familiarity. The lower 34% would be pieces with no predictable tonality patterns to use as an aid, such as the atonal Lidholm passage that was the quick-study for the audition. You can probably imagine the outcome.

One does not just suddenly acquire the skills overnight to spontaneously sight-read music like Lidholm. My music learning occurs within a tactile-motoric modality paired with auditory feedback (a.k.a learning by ear), the visual input from the music notes play a less dominant role in my music learning process. Definitely not ideal but, unfortunately, that is the compensatory skill I have acquired in order to learn music. While it serves me functionally within a choral setting, it is glaringly obvious that this is the case when faced with an audition framework. Thus, even with insightful coaching within the audition session, follow-up attempts did not elicit a significant improvement. However, it did give me new sight-reading considerations to ponder.

As for the other components in the audition, the Anton Webern test piece felt more shaky than I anticipated. I wasn't certain if it was just me, the piano accompaniment or maybe components of both, but it didn't feel settled. There were also some standard range and color exercises. Oh, isn't it always humbling to sing around your upper and lower voice breaks? The art song at the end of the session felt like a self-produced musical send-off. Which was a gift, really, since it was the only thing we had control over within the audition construct.

Overall, how did I feel regarding the audition process? I was definitely wavering between pangs of shame and humor (frustration is not a fruitful emotion to bear)... followed by an intermittent sense of worry. Alas, there is no time to dwell on the past since the individual audition is just one part of the audition process. Mini ensemble work begins today. Stay tuned, it's going to be an interesting weekend.

Until next time readers, take care!

Audition Update

Greetings readers,

It's audition update time!

You may remember a previous post where I documented my audition escapades. I thought you may be interested to know how they all turned out.

National Youth Choir (NYC)

Strangely enough, the recording I made one evening in my bedroom managed to get me accepted into the NYC. Unfortunately, by the time I received news of my acceptance, I had accepted an invitation to present my thesis research at the Canadian Speech Pathology conference which coincides with the NYC. Thus, I will not be singing with other talented Canadian choristers this May. It was a bit sad to turn down the opportunity, but as hard as I try to accommodate my speechie and chorister interests, there are just some times it doesn't mesh. Though it's unfortunate I cannot sing in the NYC, I will still be singing at Podium with Belle Canto. However, in the back of my mind, I just thought: "Well, there's still World Youth Choir..."  

Europa Cantat Chamber Choir (ECCC)

This was by far the most work intensive application I had to put together in terms of paperwork. When I received news a few weeks back that there weren't enough applications to form the choir, I just thought: "You've got to be kidding me! I learned the last two pages of the Webern test piece for nothing!" Little did I know it would be the test piece for Pro Coro auditions this week. So thank-you ECCC; I owe you one.  

World Youth Choir (WYC)

Waiting for news of this acceptance was the emotionally draining, because not only was it the last one to be announced, it was also one that required the most substantial time commitment. It's hard to plan your life when there's a gaping hole of uncertainty in your schedule. Alas, Facebook status teasers in the previous weeks didn't help either, which kept providing statistics on the number of applications and the number of available spots. Wow, there's only 1 spot for every 18 singers that applied. Those statistics don't look good, and that doesn't even take into account the number of available spots in each voice part. However, as they promised, they posted the list mid-April on Thursday morning. My stomach felt queasy as I downloaded the Alto PDF roster. I just wanted to know so I could be put of my misery and move on with my life. A quick scan of the list confirmed my general feeling of unease throughout the past few weeks. I didn't get in.

I looked more closely at the stats. There were 7 alto II positions and 4 spots for new singers (3 singers were re-invited back from the previous year). My main feelings in response to the news were disappointment followed by peacefulness. Was I really looking forward to this opportunity? Of course! I would have gotten to meet a passionate group of international choristers, sing awesome music, tour to Greece and Turkey, and write inspired blog posts. Do I feel like sobbing hysterically into my pillow? Definitely not. Clearly, I'm not emotionally crippled by the rejection, since the e-mail I received from WYC the day afterwards brought a smile to my face.

----

We are very sorry to announce that for the session 2012 of the World Youth Choir you have not been selected. 

Nevertheless, we encourage you to keep training yourself as a musician and as a singer, to audition next year in order to become part of this unique musical and social experience.

----

I just thought it was funny that, in case there was any potential misunderstanding, they provided the rejection statement in bold, red font.

Auditions are such a strange, artificial construct. Within 10-15 minutes, you're expected to demonstrate your full range and skills as a singer and we, as performers, continually subject ourselves to these vulnerable situations. I think we're all a little crazy. However, the result of being accepted makes it worthwhile because then you get the opportunity to do what you love - make music. At least that's what I'm telling myself with Pro Coro auditions coming this week. I'll be sure to keep you all posted in regards to the upcoming Pro Coro audition process.

Until next time readers, take care!

Application Season

 Greetings readers,

In the past week I have submitted applications for:

1. The National Youth Choir (NYC)

2. The Europa Cantat Chamber Choir (ECCC)

3. Eric Whitacre's Virtual Choir

4. The World Youth Choir (WYC)

Why is it that applications all seem to be due at the same time? 

While I do question why I continue to do things like this to myself, I have to admit, it's very satisfying to know that I pulled it off. While I was able to recycle some components from some of the applications, such as singing the same aria, I did have to learn a new test piece for each of them since they all had different requirements. 

The NYC audition was, by far, my most impulsive applications. I just received news of application details on Monday (I had applied back in October but hadn't heard any information, thus, I promptly forgot about it). I remember sitting at my laptop and wondering if I should submit an application. I decided that in the time I was taking to make the decision, I could be learning the test piece. Is it bad that all I can remember now is that it was in German because I cram-learned the test piece that evening? To make the recording I dragged my keyboard into my room and set-up a grassroots recording studio. Ah, the beauty of having my own USB microphone--- I can just record everything myself. I tried singing my aria a capella in my run-through but I was thoroughly disgusted with myself when I realized how far I stayed from the tonality of the piece by the end.  Since piano accompaniment was not required, I took out my iPhone, opened my Naxos library app, and found a recording of the aria I was auditioning with to playback to myself using my headphones. This was my version of choral trouble-shooting. Thankfully, the auditory feedback from the accompanying recording was enough to keep me in tune. Thus, my NYC application was recorded and submitted within the same evening. Success!

I had been prepping the ECCC application over the holiday break. The "Webern" test piece for this application was the most tonally challenging I had to prepare. Feel free to take a look at this link where you can download the pdf. As well, this application required two written recommendation letters. Anybody who has ever needed reference letters knows that it can be quite a hassle. I asked for references during the holiday season (when people aren't really working) because that's when I heard of the ECCC applications. I was extremely lucky that the ECCC applications were extended for a week because I was cutting it close with my reference letters. However, everything came through in the end and I submitted it in good time. Success!

Like a true artist who has mastered the art of procrastination, I left my Virtual Choir entry to the last minute. It definitely was not my first priority because I was busy coordinating my other applications. I did listen to the "Water Night" piece before the holiday (when the Virtual Choir was announced) so I wasn't sight-reading it when I did the recording yesterday. In comparison to the last Virtual Choir, this one was way more chorister-friendly. No more tedious Youtube uploading and label tagging, lining up beeps and plugging in headphones in a synchronized fashion--- all the video recording was done off of Whitacre's website. I also noticed that this time around there were many choral supports to help learn the piece. You could listen to people singing your individual part, somebody recorded a synth track of every individual line in the piece, and during the recording itself there was a playback of the song recording so you could even hear your part within the context of the choir. There really was no excuse for somebody not to record an entry. During the last Virtual Choir, I submitted four tracks, but since I was dedicating my attention to other applications this season, I decided that one video submission would suffice. I always enjoy watching Whitacre's conducting track because other than the fact that he looks like an archetypal Harlequin romance figure, he always has some interesting conducting gestures. I recognized one from the previous virtual choir, which I call "the finger chew" since he circulates his fingers around his mouth in order to cue more diction. The other gesture which was new for me was one where he vibrated his hand up by his ear to cue vibrato, as if he was playing an invisible cello. After three video recordings, I chose my best and submitted it via his site: success!

The WYC audition took the most logistical coordination since I needed to arrange for an audition facilitator to administer a sight-reading portion. Thus, I enlisted the help of a vocal coach to oversee my audition process and I recorded everything in one go (sight-reading, range test, test piece, and personal selection). The sight-reading component was actually quite fair, but sight-reading has never been my strong suite so I just tried to make it through as best as I could. Anybody listening to my sight-reading attempt would definitely be able to hear that I was, indeed, sight-reading. Howell's "Requiem Aeternam" test piece for this application was actually my favorite out of the three test pieces I learned. It was nice having some open chords accompany me from my audition facilitator. While I enjoy doing things by myself, it was refreshing to have some support. After assembling some accompanying paperwork, I submitted my application to the Canadian jury this evening. Success! They will review all Canadian applications before they make their recommendations for which 12 Canadian singers to submit to the international jury.

Overall, it's been a busy week. I had been planning for three of the applications for the past month but it seemed like all the submissions culminated within the same week. While I don't expect for all of my applications to be accepted (other than the virtual choir because they accept everybody's), I rationalize that it's always good over over-apply. I hope you've enjoyed reading about my application blitz!

Until next time readers, take care!

Audition Season

It's Springtime! What does that mean? It's audition season for the upcoming choir season! The Classical Music in Edmonton blog is doing a great job of posting them as they arise. For example. notices for Pro Coro, Da Camera and other choir auditions were already posted.

I also know that Cantilon Choirs is also getting into recruitment mode for all their choirs. Whether potential choristers are aged 6-9 and want to join the Primary Choirs in St. Albert, Sherwood Park, and Edmonton or in their teens and are looking at Children's Choir or Chamber Choir... this is the time to try out!

Choral music is alive and well and this is the time to take advantage of it no matter what group fits you best! Take some time to do some internet research for what groups are available in your area and give them a call to set up an audition time! Or perhaps you've been debating whether or not to audition for a group that's above your perceived level of musical skills---I say audition anyway! The only thing that they can say is no and that would be the same answer if you didn't apply at all. Take it from me, as a chorister who didn't expect to get into a professional choir after years of amateur choral singing, you never know what will happen or what people are looking for!

Have fun auditioning!